Having the “Commitment Talk” with your partner can be one of the most dreaded conversations to have in a serious relationship.
You don’t want to scare them off, but you also don’t want to proceed with unclear expectations. That’s why it’s important to discuss and come to a mutual understanding.
The fear of pressuring your partner or hearing unfavorable news often leads to avoiding the subject of commitment altogether. Analyzing casual comments and searching for unspoken signs typically only results in misunderstandings and hurt feelings. It’s crucial to communicate explicitly about exclusivity and monogamy if it’s an important factor in your relationship.
Making a commitment isn’t solely about moving in together, becoming engaged, or getting married. It’s about being clear on what you want and forming mutually agreed promises at varying stages in a relationship. Even non-monogamous couples can make commitments to one another, such as being open and honest about other romantic relationships.
The first step in discussing commitment is to understand your own needs and be honest with yourself. Be open and direct with your partner, using non-confrontational phrases like “Are you willing to…” to understand each other’s views on commitment.
Express your intentions and expectations clearly without pressure and communicate openly about what is and isn’t agreeable to both of you. If you find yourselves at an impasse, “What are you willing to commit to?” could help you both understand if your desires align.
Prioritizing open and honest communication on the topic of commitment sets a strong foundation for any relationship. It allows both individuals to understand each other’s needs and desires, aligning goals and expectations for a healthy and happy future together.
